How to Design Your Life (My Process for Achieving Goals)

Are you team NY resolutions? Or maybe you’re more of a theme word for the year kind. Perhaps January 1st is just another date on the calendar for you.

Goal setting moves into the spotlight as we enter a new year-regardless of the path you chose.

According to a study by FranklinCovey, a global performance improvement company. four out of five people that make New Year's resolutions never actually complete them. In fact, a third won't even make it until the end of January. Sounds like a recipe for failure.  Instead of setting resolutions, a good question to ask yourself is who do you want to be in 2023? 

Today I want to share my process for achieving goals. Goal setting isn't something you visit just while you watch the ball drop. 

Resolution vs. Goal

First, let's define a goal and a resolution. A resolution is a firm decision to do or not to do something, a firm decision I want to highlight that part. There doesn't seem to be any space for wiggle room here. Could that be why they fail?

The definition of a goal is the object of one's ambition, effort, or desired results. I don't know about you, but that feels a whole hell of a lot better. Right? It's a way to direct your efforts. There's room to fall flat on your face. There's room to recognize obstacles and figure out ways around them as you work towards a desired result. 

The Roadmap

I want to introduce you to the idea of the roadmap for life. It starts by taking a 30,000-foot view of what your life looks like. When setting new year's resolutions, we tend to only consider a small part of life. “I want to lose 10 pounds.” How many times have you made the same resolution and failed only to do the same thing the next year? 

A roadmap for life considers not only your health but also your business. In addition, it examines your relationships, your financial status, and all of the important things in your life. It sets goals for all of those areas and whatever you may find most important for 2023 That'll be your focus. No more than nine at the very high end 12. Don’t worry you're not going to be doing them all at once. 

No Regrets

The reason I like taking the 30,000-foot view of life approach has can be found in “Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing” a book by Bronnie Ware a hospice worker that shares the regrets of those in the final moments of life. There is wisdom in their sorrow. It is fuel to the idea of reverse engineering your life. Live into what you want it to be at the end. Here are the five top Regrets of the Dying. 

The first is I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself. Next, I wish I had worked so hard. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. I wish that I had let myself be happier. And I wish I had the courage to express my feelings. 

By doing this roadmap, we get the big vision then chunk it down into yearly goals, in to quarterly goals, into weekly goals that you are taking daily actions on. Read more about the details here.

Achievement vs Habit

Achievement goals and habit goals are both great ways to help you reach your goals. Achievement goals are usually specific, measurable, and time-bound, and are typically focused on a single accomplishment. They're great for short-term goals, and can provide motivation and a sense of accomplishment when you reach them. Habit goals involve forming beneficial habits that can help you reach your long-term goals. Habits can be anything from exercising regularly to reading more, and can help you to develop skills and healthy lifestyle habits over time. Both types of goals can help you reach your objectives, so it's important to consider which type of goal is best suited to your current needs.

Dread and the Struggle with Consistency

When trying to design your dream life, we all struggle with dread and consistency. Let's begin by discussing dread. Taking steps to achieve our goals is scary. It's difficult work, and we avoid it. It's something you've never done before, so it's scary. Get started anyways. Start achieving that goal by taking the very first tiny little step and when you take that scary first step you'll feel nervous. Yes, but you'll get a little bit more clarity. And then you continue to just take those tiny steps, tiny steps, tiny steps. We can get into a further discussion on how to identify what those tiny steps are in another post.

One of the best ways to stay consistent is to identify what is getting in your way.  To make this clear, let me give you an example. The video I'm about to shoot today was supposed to be shot yesterday. During the time-blocking process, I wrote down the talk I was preparing to present. However, I didn't realize until the morning, when I glanced at my calendar for that day that I was actually recording. I hadn't done my hair and makeup and all of that. So I put it off. However, if I had just been more clear in writing what that specific task was for today I could have been better prepared. I could have also crossed it off my list.

Lastly, don't forget to be kind to yourself. It's natural to have moments of struggle and it's important to give yourself grace when you need it.