I have a confession.
I used to pretend to sleep in on the weekends and instead use the extra time lounging in bed to check emails. Who does that?
My sweet hubby would always get up with the kids. Sacrificing his sleep so I could catch up on mine. I was always the one to get up with them during the week.
Looking back on it now, it’s ridiculous. What a crazy way to spend the time I should have been recharging? And the even crazier part...I was a full-time mom.
My family saw the value of a well-rested mommy. “Getting caught up on emails” not so much. Clearly, I had trouble asking for time alone.
This seems to be such a woman thing. We are so worried about putting everyone else first.
Let’s stop it. Here are some ways to find the alone time you need.
Yep. It’s really that simple.
Because sometimes you don’t really like people. Because sometimes you need to recharge. Because sometimes you need boundaries. Because sometimes you need time to process. Because sometimes you don’t want to put on a happy face. Because sometimes you just need silence
It doesn’t matter your reason. When you feel the pull for some time alone it’s time to get over yourself and ASK!
We don’t always get what we ask for but nobody is going to interpret your needs. Even the ones we love the most.
The timing might not always be right. I promise if you take the time to carve out the block you will be better off.
I’ll admit to hiding in my bed. Checking those emails while pretending to sleep was hiding.
The kids need you. Your husband needs you. Your clients need you. They ALL need you but who are you if you can’t find yourself?
So to that mom with her MacBook hiding in the closet right now. I see you working on your social media strategy. High five sister. I hope you brought your water with you to keep hydrated and keep pumping out those posts. The kids will find you eventually and in the end, it’s a win for everyone. The kids laugh that mom is hiding and mom smiles because she getting it done.
If you find it hard to ask for the time that you need AND the kids have found all of your good hiding spots, you can always head out for a sweat session.
Exercise will clear your mind, improve your health and it’s easy to go it alone. This is natural to introverts but extroverts may need to break away from the group classes and try:
Virtual classes or at home equipment is always an option but only if your family honours the solitude your seeking in the sweat session.
Personally, I chose to say no to the Peloton craze because right now I want the time out of the house.
I know you don’t want to hear this one. I can hear you moaning, “Not everyone is an early bird.”
You don’t have to make it a regular thing but if what you’re seeking is time alone, night owls it’s time to suck it up. Here’s why the early morning hours are the best time for solitude.
There’s this panel of wood that hangs in the entrance to each room. It’s a little bit of magic when you push it shut.
It may only buy you a few seconds before the door is opened. With enough repetition and communication, others will get the hint that you’re taking a break.
Don’t forget your wants and needs are as important as anyone else’s. Find the alone time you need even if it’s while pretending to be asleep.
You don't have to chose between your personal and professional life. Here's my secret weapon for getting the family chaos to calm.